


Five Burgers and a Large Fry

by cjwritesfanfiction



Category: Blackish, In the Heights - Miranda
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-05
Updated: 2018-01-05
Packaged: 2019-02-28 12:18:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13271319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cjwritesfanfiction/pseuds/cjwritesfanfiction
Summary: Johan becomes obsessed with Usnavi’s heart health.





	Five Burgers and a Large Fry

Johan’s obsession all started with an offhand comment made by Johan’s sister. Now, Bow didn’t mean to cast her brother into this abyss of constant worry, and it really wasn’t her fault. Johan was just nosey and wanted to know what was going on in his sister’s life since the last time he had visited nearly 6 months ago. So, it seemed like the logical thing to do for Johan and Usnavi to make their way to California for a week or two. Johan remembered the day his obsession started clearly. He had been cooking himself and Rainbow a lunch that both of them had enjoyed as children. The ingredients were organic, the birds were chirping, the sun was shining, Dre was gone; everything seemed to be perfect. That was until he heard a conversation that would change his life.

Rainbow was a licence doctor, despite Johan’s arguement that alternative medicine was better. But, he had to admit that she was one of the best he knew. He remembered back to the days when she was in school studying hard in medical school to get ahead. Johan was proud of where she was and where she was going in life. She was settled, not moving place to place like her younger brother. And though he would never admit it, it was the life Johan dreamed about. But, for right now, Johan had Usnavi and that was enough. Currently, she was talking on the phone with one of her patients about recent spikes in blood pressure and looked a little more than frustrated. 

“Yes, I know Mr. Rodreguez, but you have to watch what you are eating now. Heart disease runs high in Hispanic males and with your blood pressure spiking like this you are at risk for a heart attack.”

There it was. The fact that had hit Johan like a Mac truck plunging through a brick wall. Even though he was well acquainted with alternative medicine, Johan couldn’t make a herbal tea to get rid of a heart attack. All Johan could imagine was the greasy, fatty, New York style foods that Usnavi ate on a daily bases. Chili dogs from a hot dog vender, tacos from a Taco truck, extra expresso coffee from Usnavi’s own store – all of these played a factor in Usnavi’s health. Johan couldn’t bare to live with himself if something happened. No, there was still time… Johan could fix this! All he had to do was monitor Usnavi’s eating habits and alter them slightly. It couldn’t be that hard right? 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Johan was wrong. Usnavi was stubborn in what he put in his body. For the past week, Johan had loaded Usnavi’s plate with fresh vegetable and heart healthy meats. However, his Usnavi was crafty. He would wait until Johan wasn’t looking and sneak a burger or other such food. The only reason he knew was because he borrowed (stole) Dre’s tablet to watch the fridge camera.

Johan’s temporary fix was preparing meals for that whole family himself, which earned him many moans and groans from the kids and Dre. After the third night of eating tofu based dinners, Dre suggested that the whole family went out for dinner to his favorite spot to eat as a kid.

What Dre didn’t tell his family was that his favorite place to eat was some run down, 50’s style diner that was three and a half hours away from their home. By the time they got there, everyone was annoyed and starving with the exceptions of Usnavi and Johan. Johan was paranoid and anxious. Usnavi was just hungry. They looked over the menu together. Johan was clutching Usnavi’s hand just a little too tightly as he read the menu. A cheeseburger was a heart attack. A double cheeseburger was cardiac arrest. He didn’t even want to think about this bacon quadruple burger! 

“Jo, is everything alright? ” He glanced down at Usnavi, who was giving him a nervous look. Johan thought Usnavi looked wonderful like this. Usnavi looked alive, and Johan wanted to keep it that way! “You look… Stressed? ”

Johan swallowed. “I’m fine. Just don’t know what to get. ”

Usnavi smiled and nodded, turning his attention back to the menu. “I know! There’s so many choices. I’m not sure what I want to ge-”

“A salad!” Johan panicked talking quickly. “A salad sounds great, right? Just without all of the artery clogging- I mean artificial crap. You know without the chicken, cheese, crutons, dressing. ”

Usnavi laughed. Johan watched as his Adams apple bobbed up and down in Usnavi’s throat. This wasn’t a joke. This was life or death! “That’s just a lechuga salad. I think I’m ready to order. ” He said walking up to the counter.

Johan was glued to his spot. It was as if someone had chained him to the wall and forced him to watch the love of his life sign a deal with the devil. Usnavi hummed with a finger to his chin before ordering. “I’ll have five cheese burgers, a large fry, oh- and a Dr.Pepper” Johan’s heart sank to the bottom of his stomach and dissolved into pure heart break. If that didn’t give Usnavi a heart attack, nothing would. He had to figure something out and fast! He calmly walked over to the counter and ordered in a whisper. 

“One vegetable salad and a water, please.”

“What kind of dressing, sir? ”

“The healthiest you have.”

“Low fat, low sugar raspberry vinaigrette it is then. Your order will be ready in about ten minutes.”

Johan nodded and scooted in next to Usnavi who was admiring the decor. He started to go intp this story about his parents. Back in New York, his parents would leave Washington Heights once a month to go to a diner like this one. Usnavi explained that it didn’t cost much to go there, but his parents loved it because it was a break from reality. Johan really wished that he could listen to the story wholeheartedly. After all, Usnavi was a natural story teller. His whole face would brighten up as he told the stories about the barrio like his Abuela had once done. However, all Johan could think about was how he was going to get Usnavi away from his meal. 

“Johan!” Usnavi said loudly shaking Johan away from his thoughts. “Donde esta al baño? ” he asked with a small smile. The question in Spanish was an unspoken agreement for the two of them. Usnavi often asked him simple questions in Spanish to help him master the basics. 

“Um,” he looked around before he found the restrooms. He then took another moment to translate to simple Spanish. “por ahí.”

Usnavi kissed his cheek and smiled. “Bueno. Gracias, amour.” he whispered softly before scampering to the bathrooms. Not two minutes after Usnavi left, the food was served. Johan ignored Dre’s outburst that the food took long enough and stared at the dreaded meal. Right now, Usnavi wasn’t there… Maybe if he just… No, he was a vegan. He couldn’t eat all of that meat! But, it was for Usnavi…

He picked up the burger swallowing a wad of salavia he didn’t even realize he had in his mouth. He only had a few minutes to do this. He began to devour Usnavi’s entire meal whole. He grabbed fistfuls of fries and alternated that between large bites of juicy, grease covered burgers. By the time Usnavi returned, his food was gone.

“Qué? Donde esta mi com-” Usnavi looked up at Johan who was leaning forward clutching his stomach. “Jo, you don’t look so good. ” Johan barely made it to the bathroom before Usnavi’s meal came back up.

That night, Johan was sick all night. He threw up at least once an hour. Because of Johan’s intense health diet, his body didn’t take well to the food Usnavi was used to. Finally, Johan admitted to Usnavi why he ate all of his meal. He was scared of loosing Usnavi. Usnavi cooed him and rubbed his back softly, and the two came up with a compromise. Usnavi cut back his fast food intake to once a weak and took vitamins to help his heart, and Johan would never try to devour five cheeseburgers in one sitting.

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/cjwritesfanfiction


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